A moribund lover's resurrection

A lifeless soul once bolted
behind the estranged doors
of solitude and suffering...
on the deranged floors
hopeless and crawling...
his rudderless love-sails
many a times rocked
in oceans of muted mourning...

2006 of winter in flight
suddently his life swung
in hammocks of delight...
When the lady sizzled
in shimmering and white...
cupid-struck his heart
bemused and puzzled
when meteoric showers
of her love drizzled

Draped in gracious honors
with sweetened smile
on all corners
of melange and mellows...
arrived she on blown trumpets
and blasted bellows...
to drive away the
melancholy and the mole
from his forlorn life
that once lay scattered
in its forbidden hole.

When Life gives you Lemons - A coder's take

Another mind-bender - Oh Boy!! So I don't know why I am being asked these million dollar questions that I have no clue how to unlock. If I ever did wont I be a millionaire in the first place. That elusive bulb never flashes in the inner recesses and I am always left struggling trying to connect the dots. I wonder who at Storylane comes up with these kind of questions. Thanks Michael Landau for throwing this at me anyway.


Life in general mimics a chaotic system driven by the dynamics of skewed events on a routine basis. The events can be painful, unprecedented and sometimes bizarre that can drive you bonkers but they keep sling-shooting those lemons at ya really hard and every time one lands in your lap you are left wondering whether to chuck it back or squeeze the citric juices out of it. Either ways you gotta handle it. As I write this my mind is already voyaging back a decade when I was working on a paper on synchronizing chaotic systems such as Rossler attractors using Fuzzy Logic Controllers and I was just so enamored with the AI stack that it did not dawn on me to draw those corollaries with Life. May be it was not needed at that time. 14 years later I see them linearly overlapping well almost.

Synchronizing life's chaos is certainly not easy although its not difficult either. Those logic controllers are always at play to defuzzify the chaos in your life that gets stirred up your way by the masterful fate. Logic controllers in layman terms are brick-mortared with rules, rules and more rules. So when you start as a kid, your slate is clean, there are no rules but as you come through the ranks you are always establishing a rule-base  on which your future dealings with life will be determined - those rules could be a learning curve, a sad experience that has made you stronger, a knowledge driven exercise that is now in your arsenal to bank on. And on top of if you are spiritualist like me who constantly hones on his mental fortitude by virtue of meditation - the effects are unreal. The mind being a great wanderer is now more in control and can be redirected to focus on pressing issues than  loiter aimlessly forever. The toughest thing in this world is not the most complex algorithm to crack, it is to be able to reign in on your mind to focus, reflect and evaluate the problems that stumble out of your life's closet.

When a coder is assigned an application defect to troubleshoot, he attempts to address it in a very impersonal rationalized way, blanking out all assumptions that might deter his chances. Nothing is taken for granted. Similarly that same coder when solving life's problems will approach it no differently - analyze and debug the issue by sifting through the event logs, look for a pattern of events that he may have experienced in the past, isolate the problem and then either provide a temporary hack to stop the bleeding or work on a long term solution. And yet there will be occasions when the defect intentional or not may impact other stakeholders in the ecosystem created around you - could be a tiff with your colleague at work, a quarrel with your wife on not obliging her with a solitaire or a busted day at work. The chaos that emanates from such aberrations in life needs to be handled the way the coder does with a sense of clarity and calmness. If that defect was your own doing, accept it, fix the issue and move on. Don't let your false hubris come in the way of accepting your fault.

When the problems in life are fatalist in nature like a hurricane ravaged home or a severe accident that is life threatening or a health in tatters - akin to those server crashes from hung threads, transaction rollbacks or deadlocks on the database. But unlike the transaction recovery mechanism on servers, life does not offer any such instant recovery solution  while inflicting those wounds. The rehab journey in such situations could be sapping, debilitating and arduously long. The weak would crash into the abyss never to rise again.  The strong desires to rise again some through nerves of steel others through bundles of jubilant energy and yet a few through rigors of spiritual affiliations and faith-driven investments into that superior Unknown.

The intent here was not to bombard you with technical terms but to present an insight in a different perspective through the lenses of a coder and how he interprets, debugs and squeezes those lemons and gulps up his lemonade cocktail  - and I mean literally :-)

The Sacred word that binds them all

Hinduism and Christianity is poignantly very similar. What is Christ to Christians is Krishna to Hindus. The underlying tenet of both religions stems from metaphysics which preaches that there is one and only God which is in the form of light. The only way Hinduism differs with Christianity is in the path that leads to this Supreme God. Many enlightened souls (Aatma) of past and present, merged into this Supreme Soul (Parmatama) through years of spiritual meditation (not to confuse with New Age Yoga). Take for instance Paramhansa Yoaganand ( Autobiography of a Yogi), an enlightened soul who achieved self realization through years of practicing the teachings of Lord Krishna in Bhagwad Gita known as "Kriya Yoga" (Kriya means Action and Yoga means "the state where you unite with the Divine"). Essentially in a nutshell it means - by constantly doing something good, you are progressing towards divinity. From the spiritually enlightened lenses, "doing something good" is far more than physical action, it is the mental action that you perform within by practicing any spiritual methodology for e.g. locked in a lotus posture you are honing into the Christ consciousness (region between your eyes) or silently chanting "OM" or "AUM" "AMEN" in Christianity, "AMEEN" in Islam that will eventually have far reaching consequences.

Buddhism is an offshoot of Hinduism which is very clearly evident by how Lord Buddha attained spiritual enlightenment. He was born into a Hindu family who left the palatial pleasures in search of God. When he was finally spiritually enlightened, it happened in the form of a blinding light that took all over him and thus he merged into the Supreme.

The essence of Bhagwad Gita and thus Hinduism is, "Know thyself (yourself) by performing Karma or Kriya" which in this case is spiritual meditation and you will know God. No one religion is better or worse than other, if one religion can take you to God, it is the best for you. Ultimately what matters is attaining that state of spiritual enlightenment or self-realization, without which you will never reach God.

As for drawing parallels among the three religions we are talking about, the single most powerful thread that binds them all is in the commonality of the the sacred word across these religions AUM for Hindus, Amen for Christians and Ameen for Muslims. This is the sacred word from where the universe is believed to be originated. "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. (John 1:1 KJV)".

A Techie survives - Hard work or Talent

A programmer who has survived a dot-com bust of 2001 and a severe recession that threatened to relapse into the The Great Depression of the 1920s during the past decade will tell you they have done reasonably well. But it was not easy at all - you had to keep pushing yourself to the limits and beyond with tenacity, iron-clad will and sheer hard work to keep pace with your naturally talented colleagues, hiring and spending freeze, mass layoffs and also in general with the technology in a state of constant flux. There were endless days with minimal sleep trying to scrape through those ever-elusive deadlines that even had greater impact on health and social engagements. And then there were days when it was a do or die situation when the client production system would be down impacting their business and all eyes from the CIO to your Direct Report fixated right on you and you under tremendous pressure to deliver.

It is one thing to be solving a complex problem on your own and totally opposite when that complex problem is under the constant hammer of surveillance. The neural synapses in a state of panic go into a huddle mustering all they can to troubleshoot the issue and save your client from losing millions. Barring an odd failure here and there, when you manage to bail them out on numerous occasions, you start to command their respect and become their go to guy. While this comes with the territory and there are so many techies out there who have have gone through the same rigors and probably did better, it surely has been a satisfying experience for me on a personal level. Recently I got an achievement letter for being the most billable consultant in my company last year by a stretch along with a $200 gift certificate. While this may not sound a big deal, these small tokens of appreciation keep you going.

A high-profile entrepreneur Jonathan Gheller (CEO Mixtent) asked me on Storylane - What is my greatest talent? How do you use it? - I would say I am not so sure (may be knack for problem solving) but I do know that I have bundles of sheer perseverance and grit, that never give-up attitude that has bailed me out on countless occasions. And on those occasions when I have sent emails out at 3 or 4 in the morning notifying your VPs and CIOs that you did it and their praising rejoinders on a Job well done - that sense of accomplishment has been unparalleled to date.

Even the most exciting talents in the world are invariably wasted sans hard work.

 

Dilemma of an IT Architect

At a time when my IT career appears to be stuck in the second gear, a few questions have been springing up lately in my mental corridors. The dreaded of them all is – Have I hit the colossal wall of career stagnation? Being an IT architect have I run up the steps of the corporate IT ladder? Do I have to settle for this for the rest of my career lifespan?

In a typical IT hemisphere, graduating to a Solution Architect or an Enterprise Architect comes with some healthy perks and a degree of job satisfaction depending on what kind of work you are involved in. If you are an Architect in Google or Amazon, clearly you have your hands full and you may be working on the next big thing like a Google Glass or bolstering Amazon’s Cloud offering. Technology dances on your fingertips while you conceptualize and model the products. Breaking new ground and constantly moving towards that finish line adds to the daily thrills along with the pure job satisfaction. The innovation quotient keeps you on your toes all the time. However there are times when Solution Architect role in another Fortune 500 company may lack that excitement buzz. While you may be engaged in some cool stuff like modeling and automating a mortgage business process on an IBM middleware, your innovativeness is hampered by the scope of the project and the choice of the enabler. Even a slightly aging technology starts to hamper your own growth as you see your Google peers hurtle by you.

Before I start digressing too much, the point I am trying to put across is when you are already positioned as an Architect, there is hardly any room to move up the ladder, and when you are stuck working on the same platform/technology for couple of years, your skill-sets start to depreciate and eventually become dated. This sense of discomfiture leaves you wondering – Jeez!! What do I need to do to get my career throttle into the third or fourth gear?

Should one move out into a parallel role in an innovation-centric work culture where the best brains huddle up to write the next Dropbox or an Open Table. Or should one fork out into a managerial position by pursuing an MBA. Even if you land a manager position in some company will you keep up with the agile driven projects, tight deadlines and managing the allotted budget. Bottom line you are sort of severed from the technology landscape specially designing and coding apps. Or should one branch out into an entrepreneurial role by engendering a business idea that you have the conviction to launch as your startup knowing fully well, finding that ever-elusive angel investor might feel like climbing the Everest.

Some of the counter-questions boomerang back - Can you handle the rigors of sustaining a startup, work the long hours, be ready to sacrifice your social outings and ride the storm out during the ebbs with your coworkers/co-founders. Or can you pay for your MBA program and land a decent job Will it bring a sense of closure? Will you not miss writing some beautiful code on your favorite IDE.

The answers to these myriad of options and the dilemma surrounding them will eventually come from within knowing fully well who you are and what you are capable of.

My Beloved - Natural for the Crown

This, to thee, I must convey,
Best of thy dark and bright dazzled me,
As thou passed me the other day.
Ladies, who've favored me with attentions,
Their ilk suddenly trivial, their faces ugly,
Masks of colorful pretensions.
Esteemed gentlewomen of reputed Halls,
Dwarfed in thy comparison,
Dwarfed to mere wax dolls.
Thine eyes, with long-lash curtains half-down,
                                                                        Thy hair, mistaken for dark night,
                                                                        Done, undone, natural for the crown.

NAMASTE Oscars!!!

“Namaste” as Ang Lee signed off his valedictorian speech littered with too many pause moments, after winning the 2012 Oscar for Best Director for Life of Pi, which reportedly pandered to the Indian diaspora across the world. But what appears to have missed by many from his speech is another ear-catcher – “Cant waste time talking of the cast”. While he did single out the young protagonist – Pi (Suraj Sharma); adult Pi (Irrfan Khan of The Amazing Spiderman fame) and Gita (Tabu of The Namesake Fame) – two prominent Indian actors from Bollywood were given a miss in his speech.

While some may chide me for making a big deal out of this, this to me is a wider endemic ingrained in the “I am superior” western psyche that appears to relish their half-baked conceptualized notions of India as a third world country, a 0.66 India who thrives below a $1 a day poverty line. While there may be some truth to that, these directors are really obsessed with the “impoverished” India, its daily struggles that assumes an even more ostentatious portrayal in their direction. The dynamic Uber India and its strong urban middle class that has catapulted the Indian stature both in economic growth and emerged as a Technology hub for world to take note of, is often left out for a very simple reason – it does not catch the figment of their imagination. What really excites the western audience in general is “India in the trenches”; a proven stereotypical Oscar winning recipe smartly mastered by the movie-chefs of recent times – Ang Lee, Danny Boyle to name a few. So the fact that Ang Lee ignored such Bollywood stalwarts in Tabu and Irrfan comes with that territorial mindset towards India in general. It appears Indian legend Anupam Kher (Silver Linings Playbook as Cliff Patel) had to fly solo at the Oscars as both Tabu and Irrfan were perhaps given an unceremonious snub.

Interestingly India’s biggest superstar of past 40 years Amitabh Bacchhan makes his Hollywood debut in the upcoming flick The Great Gatsby featuring Leonardo Dicaprio. Knowing Amitabh, it will be very difficult to imagine that he would settle for a junk role that likes of Anil Kapoor seem to grab with drooling tongues and popping eyes – remember Mission Impossible – The Ghost Protocol where Anil Kapoor played an embarrassing cameo as a business tycoon who gets beaten up by a lady. Still remember that night when I was watching that movie in the theater and folks around were going in splits watching his comical jabs that landed nowhere. Yes the same Anil Kapoor who hit a jackpot with Slumgdog Millionaire. Grapple this – In MI-V, the fancy Indian hotel with women attired in traditional lehngas dancing to some classical score in the background and high-tech car parking facility had nothing Indian about it, infact the entire sequence was shot at 5 star hotel Jumeirah Zabeel Saray in Dubai while the car silo itself was a Special Effect rendition of a parking facility in the Autostadt plant in Germany engineered by a team out of Vancouver. So the question is why would not they indulge qualified V/X teams in India to engineer the same special effect marvel, yet quickly pounce at the slightest opportunity to shoot car chase sequences through filthy ghettos of Mumbai.

Another clichéd notion of Indians is the Patel-ization of their characters in movies. Not all Indians are Patels while most Patels are of Indian origin. Hollywood somehow has this bizarre fixation for tagging them as Patels in their movies – Pi Patel, Cliff Patel. Nothing against Patels, some of my closest friends have been Shahs and Patels but it restricts India’s diversity to spread on the world’s biggest stages.

While directors like Lee and Boyle bask in their creative geniuses to portray India on global celluloid, it remains to be seen if this obsession of painting India in poor light will one day be passé.

This write up is only a microcosmic superficial insight into the western perception towards India but would like to share a brilliant analysis by Srividya Subramanium's that provides an in-depth study of India's portrayal in western movies A Content Analysis of the Portrayal of India in Films Produced in the West.

Paths we tread and then dread....

Often we find life in disdainful hurry hurtling into abyss of rudderless  sojourns ; merging into intersections where the basic tenets of existence are trampled and slighted, and capped with remorseless empowerment. During such shameful passages, the remnants of virtuous conscience often looks the other way as if conveying a message of helplessness. The sheepish clutches of intemperance and inner lawlessness continue to shred the soul into fragments never to be stitched again. The shameless thrills one derives from such lows are appalling at the least. Yep Self destruction in auto-pilot mode. And when the realization comes, life is already in the caskets and being prepared for the final burial. The guilt ridden soul scared to take that long road to hell often looks for a cleansing agent or a quick-strike catharsis that would purge them from all the excesses they may have once vaingloriously indulged in. Frequent trips to the local tombs and temples become the norm that for most part used to be an exception. The holy yet nervous chants seldom reach the metaphysical realms and even if they miraculously do they face rejection.

Life present all kinds of vicissitudes, the path one takes to trot on it makes all the difference. If you tread on Intemperance, you also had the option to embrace self control, if you opted for violence, peaceful offerings were right there, you just did not acknowledge it. Be it spiritual forbearing, ill-upbringing  or bad company, the dark traits often reign supreme resulting in cerebral transgressions that eventually snowball into one incurable hemorrhoid forcing life to operate in a vacuum.

The narrative above is a feeble attempt to acknowledge the excesses we indulge in our daily tribulations and the need for recursive ponderance to ensure checks and balances quintessential for conscience regulation that will keep the hegemonic vices from taking over. A constant reminder is requisite that there is still time before the life goes into those dreaded caskets. Amen!!!!

Irate, Berate...sigh - Emirate!!!

So my worst experience till date was traveling Al Italia, Believe It or Not - Emirates just narrowly missed out . And no this is no one-time-all-hell-break-loose kinda experience. This is a chronic malaise drilled into each nook and cranny of the Economy Class seating and unless there is an architectural reorientation or "enlargement" of seats - this one is a malaise-soon-turning-into-epidemic. And yes the Emirates website fools you like no other, the fancy pics of bar lounges, spas for women etc is all hogwash as it means nothing to Economy class folks. In fact I was shocked to see even the business class seats on the narrower side. Trust me the United/Continentals seats and leg space while not absolutely comfortable is still lot better than Emirates.

So I got lucky at check-in where the south-east asian lady agreed to do a free check-in of my carry on - could not thank her enough including a full bend forward Japanese style - "Domo Arigato" and lucky because everyone else were being asked to pay out 50$ or so.


That on top of the world feeling was short-lived after boarding the flight - the seats were atrociously cramped. The arm-rest was literally a thin strip of real-estate perhaps intentionally made for two folks to have a jostling bout on who can capture that elusive territory - may be a creative pitch to while those 13 hours away. The much hyped up food was a major letdown on the first leg from DC to Dubai - Unsalted Vegetable Biryani with rice and vegetables felt like were "separated for ages" literally. The cold sandwich as a go-between was ok and the breakfast before the landing of cheese omelet was blandly tasteless. They had thick boiled potatoes sprinkled over the omelet with a siding of spinach tucked in the corner. Gave spinach the cold shoulder which it thoroughly deserved. Besides the constant gas emissions from foods rotting in people's stomachs felt like a close brush with Gas Chambers of Auschwitz ...that was for the Jews this was for everyone flying - result was the same - a near genocide. So folks who were raving about Emirates food were either fooling around or perhaps have rather awful taste esp when it comes to food. Like I said this was no one-time fluke my wife who traveled 3 weeks earlier had a similar experience.

So much for the first leg to Dubai. Dubai itself is a melting pot of Duty-Free shoppers who have a single motive in life before take off and that is to grab whatever they can from Dubai - Pears soap (yes you heard it right), dry fruits, Chocolates - The same Lindt chocs that you get at Costco for 10$ comes for 20$ at DXB with a compelling tag - Duty Free. Burger King joint I must say had a better selection than the ones we find in US. The airport is more like a shopping mall that also by the way allows for takeoffs and landings...the 2 and a half hour lay over was awful after a 13 hour long flight. Second leg was another 2 and a half hour roller coaster with really uncomfy seats but a more decent menu selection with chicken tikka masalas, lamb rogan josh with phirni as a dessert. The last 5 hours of the journey turned out to be extremely exhausting.

Where Emirates scores is with its ICE Entertainment system with a larger selection of everything from movies to music to tele-shows. My entertainment system broke midway through the flight but luckily I saw Avengers and Agneepath and watched Act of Valour with a section of the screen blocked out from a text - There seems to be a problem with your audio - We are trying to reset it" .

They also have a better selection in juices and drinks and the wines are complimentary. May be they have a hidden agenda - Wine will make you forget everything including our horribly squeezed out seats and unceremonious menu selection that tastes awful bland.

So my personal takeaways from this DC-Dubai-Delhi leg is:

Pros: - Eye-pleasing flight attendants (but I will still take the old grumpy stewardesses from United any day just for more comfortable seats and better leg space and a less tiring journey) - Better variety of juices and complimentary drinks - Excellent ICE entertainment system

Cons: - Horrible food for most part - The crammed seats kills the whole mood - 5 hour second leg of the journey from DBX to DEL is over-exhausting esp after a 13 hour ordeal. Would rather take the 14 hour nonstop that United offers as it is less exhausting. - Morning takeoff is odd as you mostly stay awake for most of your journey since your body is still doing US-time. I hardly had an hour of sleep if that. Bottomline - I am done with Emirates unless...unless...there are some throwaway deals that might outweigh everything.